Fate or Fault

The text below is not really related to Levinas, more to my personal life, but still it has some relevance with regard to Levinas and anyway I would like to post this on my weblog. And then I hope that you like to read it :)

And I wonder how Levi
nas would think about this, I think he would not disagree with me...


Fate or fault

Hidde said that there are two kind of people: on the one hand the ones who believe that their lives are determined by fate, that most of what happens to them is due to factors which are beyond their control, that their lives are determined by a mixture of good luck and bad luck (or otherwise by the will of God, which means as well beyond our control). On the other hand there are the ones who believe that the way they live their lives is the result of their own choices and actions.

I thought about this, of in which category I belong myself, and how it works exactly. And then I thought of adding another dimension to it: time. You could say that I belong to the second category, even though I emphasize more often how fragile we are as humans towards fate. Still I believe in the power of my will, but I only apply this to the future, not to the past. Why? Because to apply such thoughts / feelings, feelings of guilt, to the past, would mean to allow embitterment / frustration to nestle inside of me. Thoughts like that could go like: “This is all my fault, it always goes like this, such a fool I am, I am good for nothing, it will only get worse, it is hopeless.” I think it is good to realize that many bad things happen to us which we can’t help at all. It is only human to make mistakes and we our goodness is fragile. We are such small and limited creatures, who are we to think that we can change the whole world and to blame ourselves only when things didn’t go as we planned it. I can be angry with myself, frustrated, feel guilty, feel hopeless, but what is the use of that? These feelings are bitter / sour, they poison me, they make it impossible for me to move, they make me indifferent, passionless, will-less, motionless. I have to protect myself against that, I should not allow such thoughts / feelings, otherwise I will become embittered and motionless.

So I do believe in the power of my choices and actions, but only for the future, and only in a positive way. By thinking for instance: “If I want things to improve, I have to do something about it right now.” Even if I feel that there is no hope, no perspective, I am still not powerless, because no matter how much bad luck, no matter how much suffering, oppression; my soul is free still. There is always something I can choose between, also if both options are bad / difficult. So let’s make a deliberate choice. I can always imagine a better world and I can always try to move in that direction.

And for me it is very important that I dare to look at myself in the mirror, completely, to open up totally, that I dare to face myself, and that I face all my problems, handicaps, obstacles, fears, regrets, mistakes, my pain. To go once more through these deep feelings and thoughts from the past, which are still bothering me (or which have harmed someone else, and which have not been put right yet), to be able to overcome them by facing them a second time and conquering them, learning how to deal with it.

What is needed for the past is to no longer deny what happened, to face it, to understand it, and to accept it. You cannot change the past anymore anyway, you can only learn something from it for the future. To face the crisis, to understand it, and to accept it, these steps are needed before forgiveness is possible, to oneself and from somebody else. These steps are needed before we can start a new life. These steps are needed to avoid the embitterment of regrets, guilt and denial, but to make a step forward, to shine with our light in the darkness and bring new light, new hope.

There is so much more than this. So much more than frustration about little things, a routine life, the unbearable lightness of everydayness, the emptiness, the little minds of the herd, the easiest way to go on, without thinking, full of lies and pretending, deaf for the passion of my heart, motionless, indifferent.
So much more than this, infinitely more. And the freedom of imagination is never-ending. If I want a new life I should start going there right now.
Where there is a will, there is a way.


I woke up and the world outside was dark
All so quiet before the dawn
Opened up the door and walked outside

The ground was cold

I walked until I couldn’t walk anymore
To a place I’d never been
There was something stirring in the air
In front of me, I could see

More than this
So much more than this
There is something else there
When all that you had has all gone

More than this
I stand
Feeling so connected
And I’m all there
Right next to you

It started when I saw the ship go down
I saw them struggle in the sea
And suddenly the picture disappears
In front of me

Now we’re busy making all our busy plans
On foundations built to last
But nothing fades as fast as the future
And nothing clings like the past, until we can see

Then its alright
When with every day another bit falls away
But its still alright, alright, alright
And like words together, we can make some sense

Much more than this
Way beyond imagination
Much more than this
Beyond the stars
With my head so full
So full of fractured pictures

I’m alone
Feeling so connected
And I’m all there
Right next to you

I’m alone
Feeling so connected
And I’m all there
Right next to you

Where there is a will, there is a way.
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This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Hi Hamas,

It seems that I can only talk to you here, not in your Orkut scrapbook or by sending you a message. But you can send me a message if you want to talk to me in the future...

Thank you for your post on my weblog. I hope that you understand now what kind of a person I am. I am not at all an Islam-hater (my belief as a religious humanist comes the closest to Islam), I believe that Allah is my God as well. And I have no superiority complex, on the contrary, I see it as my obligation to help the people who were born with less luck than me. I am on your side. I want to support the sheep in their struggle against injustice and oppression. I am with Palestine, Kurdistan, against Bush, against Danish cartoons, for Africa, for the third world, for the poor, for strangers, etc.
Some weeks ago I went to a lecture at the university form a Palestinian speaker from the Combattants for Peace. He said that he didn't ask much from Europe, from the university, just solidarity. And that is what I can do, show solidarity, and to try to contribute to a better world with projects for development in Senegal, Tanzania (Aids-orphans) and Nicaragua.

Did you read this: http://levinasandculture.blogspot.com/2005/08/you-have-to-ask-sheep-whos-wolf.html
and this: http://levinasandculture.blogspot.com/2006/04/work-of-justice.html

Good that you work for a human rights group and that you try to release innocent people from prison.

You did threaten me to delete IR, in weblog (I am quite sure it was you). I think that extremism / aggression is no solution. Especially here in Europe, but in fact in the whole world, we will have to find a way to live together in a good way, Muslims, Jews, atheists, etc. From both sides tolerance and acceptance is needed. I can understand that when you fight oppression, acceptance and tolerance of the oppressors is not possible. Still the solution should be peaceful.

If I ban you or become angry it is because of that, because I want to stop extremism, even if it is only in words. Rolf is not my friend, I try to stop his extremism as well.
If you send me a scrap that you will respect the rules of IR I will unban you.

Bye, take care,

Hi ;)
oh... what mad comments!
what do you suppose about it?
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